Me

So I posted on FaceBoook that I have a blog and basically dared people to find it. :) Who knows if anyone really cares enough to find it, let alone to read it.

I talked to the owner of McD's yesterday and he asked me if I had talked to Wendy about my reduced hours and change in duties. I said yes but that I'm really not a lobby person and that I would take a couple of weeks and think about it. I also told him that there were 2 people who made my working environment a living hell and that I wasn't gonna name them. He's a new owner so he doesn't know anyone and I'm not gonna badmouth fellow employees. that's just rude and so unprofessional.

On another note Matthew is coming to visit for xmas, we pick him up from my brother Percy's house on Tuesday. Not sure how long he is staying.

Later and Be Well

Work

Here is a ranting post.

I work at McDonald's, and it is supposed to be a fun place to work or at least stress free, but for some reason this one has two ladies who go out of their way to make my life miserable. Now I suffer from migraines, I hadn't had one in about a year and suddenly they are starting to come back and stronger than before. Before we moved back to our hometown I had a headache for about 2 years. I was what I liked to call a 'functioning migraine' The pain was a part of my everyday life and my family had to tiptoe around me, I didn't smile much those days.

I've called in sick when my headaches get to the point of where I can't see, seriously. I've also called in when my youngest has been sick, he's only 9 and can't stay home by himself. But back to my rant.

One of the ladies has threatened to quit about this stating that she has to work twice as hard even when I am there. It's got to the point that I let her do what she wants and say what she wants cause if I say anything she starts laughing and saying that is not how it is done and she knows how it is done.
The other one is the one who trained me and with her, she treats me like I am a moron who can't remember anything that was ever said to me. Heaven forbid I think for myself and act on it with out her express approval. She is the 'Brewmeister' of work and spends her time "dealing with coffee and making sure we have enough for counter and drive thru". There could be a line up of people waiting to be served and she spends 5 minutes rinsing out a coffee pot and standing in front of the coffee station so the customers have to wait to be served. Saying "Excuse me" does not work and I will not resort to pushing her out of the way. If I say anything about getting some help from her with the line up her response is "If I don't keep making coffee we will run out and they will have to wait anyway" And the other lady is saying that I should be able to handle the customers by myself anyway and to let the 'V' do what she does best.
I have no problem with lineups of customers but she goes out of her way to make sure she' does not help with them, or helps with a select few.

An example is from yesterday. 2 men were talking in the lobby, I asked if either one had been served 1 said ' V is getting it for me'. So I took the other ones order, made it and he paid for it. All the while V is still puttering around and NOT getting cust 1's coffee. And she knows what each regular cust has in their coffee (god forbid if I get it wrong). So I ask him again if he wants anything and again he says V is getting it. I ask V if she was getting his coffee and she said "no", she thought he was with the cust I served since they were talking while waiting to get served.


So I'm not on the schedule for the next couple of weeks, I'm to take the time to think about the other hours the manager offered me. later in the day and a lobby shift to boot. I'm sorry but I do not do lobby. Hubby says to just look for another job and to blast V and MF. Me, I say I'm not like that and hubby replies that I'm way to nice to people who are assholes and bitches. To which I reply "I'm the better person by not stooping to their level of pettiness".


Well enough for the rant now, I feel a little better for having vented it.

Later and Be Well.

Government

So today I was checking all my regular websites to see what's happening. and I come across an article about Hydro Ontario. Needless to say I think the company needs to be held accountable and maybe have an outside administrator overseeing things, but then they'd just raise the rates again and blame it on that. Sometimes there is no winning.

In other news, we got the expansion for world of warcraft on Tuesday and hubby and I started playing it at 2am. Yeah I know we're nerds, or geeks. I must say that I like the changes made with this one. Especially with dungeon quests. No more traveling all over hell and back.

That's it for today.

Later and Be Well

Pay it Forward day...

So I was just going thru the blogs I regularly read and I notice that Shrinn has posted about paying it forward. Well this is something that Dwayne and I do on a regular basis, I didn't know that there was particular day for it. Dwayne calls it karma, that what you give out to other people will come back to you, or the secret. :)

On other fronts hubby and I have made alts and are leveling together, just something to do before the Warcraft Expansion comes out on December 7/2010. I'm doing the digital download and I have that day off so I can start playing at 12:01 am. The only question is am I gonna make a Worgen or a Goblin first......hmmmm.......that's hard to say. I will make both but with what classes i have no idea :S oh well I'll figure it all out.

later all and be well

Oh Boy!!

Well here goes nothing. I have been without internet for about a week now and I am slowly going crazy. As I'm writing this from the library's computer and I don't have much time, this is a short post. Really short. When we get internet back I will make a longer post. Who knows it may even have something of interest on it. :)

Later all and Be Well

Meh

Well it's been a while since I posted anything. What to say? Oh, I don't know.... I hate my life, the way my body looks.

I've supposed to have been writing a letter to my late father about some things that I really don't want to remember, My mother says it will help me to deal with my depressions and issues. I just don't know what to put in the letter. How do I deal with 30 or so years of bad memories and disappointments from the man who was supposed to be my father. I thought he was supposed to love me unconditionally and not necessarily approve of the choices I make in life but to support me in the decisions I do make, even if they are the wrong ones. Do I put it in more detail that he was never really a father to me and that my older brother was more of a father than he would ever be. Ok he came to my graduation from high school, but then it would have been upsetting to my grandma (his mother) if he didn't come, seeing as I was graduating from Shoal Lake where I had been living with her for a year. But even there my older brothers were more visible as authority figures, and everyone could see just how much I idolized them and wanted to make them proud of me. It seemed like every time I tried to make my father proud of me I failed really badly. Sure I graduated from high school but I didn't finish college. I got pregnant by my ex boyfriend who said he wanted nothing to do with me or the baby and for me to have an abortion as it was not his anyway. When I got pregnant I was living with him, his second wife, and her kids, whom he had chosen over his own kids to many times to count. I don't even remember what I did to get thrown out of his house and life, they had known for about 3 months before I was kicked out. If we needed something and they needed something well they got what they needed and we did without. I don't want to hate him, I won't dance on his grave like i was telling everyone i would before he died. I actually love him and didn't want him to die at all. I was there at the end for him, I felt his life slip away right beneath my fingers as his heart beat it's last. I don't want to do that again, it's heartbreaking to say the least and really really hard on a person's emotions.

I'll leave it her for now..

Take care and Be Well

Just Blah

Hey there so it's been a while since I posted anything.... Bad Ely. Let's see where to start.... I disowned my mothers youngest daughter, my son got a job, I got a job and promptly lost my mind (anxiety kicked in). I think I have to see a therapist and get my meds changed or something cause I don't think they are working anymore. The first couple of shifts I had I was doing ok and then on my 3rd shift, I got really shaky and I couldn't remember anything she had told me from before. She asked me if everything was ok and I explained about my depression and anxiety, it seems she's on anti-depressants as well. She also said to not view this as a failure but a success in the fact that I tried. Hubby has been telling me that I need to get my hair cut, colored, and permed and that will make me feel better. He also said that maybe I could get a puppy (small dog).
I'm gonna try volunteering and see how that goes, sorta ease my way back into working, baby steps for me. Not gonna go over to well with my mother in law but hey it's my mental and emotional health that's important to me.

The son got a job working with hubby, and seems to like it.



Later all and may the Force be with You

So I'm sitting here playing Bingo online and thought to myself 'Gee I haven't posted anything on the blog recently' Oh boy am I a slacker :)Let me see where do I start. Well we ended up going into the city several times which threw the budget right out the window and leaves us a tad short for the month. who knew weddings were expensive, oh well it was all worth it cause it got all my brothers and sisters together for a happy time instead of sad one. My mother got to see most of her grandchildren, she was missing 5. My brothers rode in from Ottawa on their motorcycles, Cim just bought himself a Harley :) On the downside Dwayne was too ill to go to the wedding or reception so he stayed in the hotel room sleeping and I got to drive. It's not often I can drive, he says I make him nervous. My drivings ok, I didn't kill anyone. :P

That's all that sticks out atm more later.

A Funny Story

I have this story kicking around in my head for several months now and I would like to share it with all.



Lemons

It was a gorgeous spring day and a rare time when the four friends were together. They had all moved to different parts of the country but stayed in touch. It was the usual girl talk, kids, jobs, hobbies. The talk turned to their husbands, as it always seems to, when Rebecka said ‘Have you ever noticed how men describe our boobs as fruit?’
Susan replied ‘Yeah, they call them melons, or some other form of fruit.’ Laughing, Jessica said ‘You know we should call men's some fruity name too.’ Well that got us all laughing and trying to come up with some fruit names for our husbands moobs (man boobs). We came up with lemons, limes, and grapes. Now here is where the conversation gets really funny and has people staring at us because we are laughing hysterically.

Rebecka ‘My hubbies are like lemons.’
Jessica ‘Mine are like grapes.’
Naomi ‘Mine are like limes.’
Susan started to pretend cry as she wailed ‘I don’t have any! He’s got none!’

Oh Boy!!!

Well it's been a couple of weeks since i posted last and so much has happened. My oldest who was working got royally screwed over on his first paycheck and all the manager would say is 'Maybe he didn't clock back in after his breaks.' Like come on he was missing over half of the hours he worked and your gonna tell me that it is his fault. He worked for the company before and knew how to clock in and out, he's not some stupid kid working his first job. I'm not worried tho he'll find another one soon.

My daughter turned 14 and is spending 2 weeks with one of her aunties and is having a blast. when I talked to her last night she was eating bannock! and my sister asked if it was OK for her to give the kid a smoke? My daughter asked her for one!!! We made some arrangements for when we go into Winnipeg her my auntie Ellery's wedding in a week. We told her she didn't have to go to the wedding but can spend the night with one of her friends and we'd pick her up on the way out of the city. It was a compromise as her friend wouldn't be able to come and stay for a couple of weeks (it's way to crowded here)

The youngest is just hanging out with his friend and having fun not going into school, both of the kids passed their grades Woohoo!!!! He's not doing much.

The hubby and I took a trip into Wpg to see some friends and get an upgrade on his comp for his game 'StarCraft 11' which comes out this month and since I'm not gonna share my comp (I'm already sharing it with the kids) he got his done. It's my turn next for an upgrade :) The friend we went to see is taking a leave of absence from work and storing all the furniture and stuff while he's in Edmonton with his wife and daughter. I'm not sure if I had mentioned it but his daughter is recovering from cancer and from the treatments her heart failed so she has a Berlin Heart and will hopefully get on the transplant list soon, but until then she's in the children's hospital in AB and he's tired of not being able to see her and his wife every day.

So that's it for now hopefully I won't wait so long to post again :)

GRAD!!!!!

Hi all just a quick note to day that my course is over and I'm soooo happy. I had my mom and my oldest son there, and my son decided that he wants to do the course when it starts again in the fall. Before he goes into the mature student high school program. I think it would be good for him.

Some of us went out to supper and then to one of the local bars, I have never felt so old as i did then. I know I don't look 40 but boy did i feel it tonight. The bar was one that i went to when I was young and carefree (about a lifetime ago). It was packed with people about the age I was when I went there, and some of them were dressed the same way too. It's true when people say that fashion trends just keep going in circles and what was old is new again. I had about 7 drinks and so far I feel really good. Gonna eat my wings and drink my slurpee and maybe sleep on the couch as the youngest is sleeping in my bed with my hubby :)

Just Stuff

Well I'm almost done with my course only 1 more day to go then graduation and lunch. I still don't like all the touchy feely crap being done but oh well I got some great certificates and a professional resume out of the deal :D I can't remember if I mentioned that we had to do a paper about 'Who Inspires Me' I did mine on my brother Cim and what role he has played in my life. I sent him a draft to edit and get his opinion on it, well when he emailed me back he called me a meanie cause he opened it up at work and he had to be all macho and manly :P

I showed the paper to my mom and she asked if she could have it and I said sure. I'm gonna print off another couple, make the font bigger and more fancy looking. I'll frame mine and give one to him to keep ( maybe I'll put it in a frame as well )

It's gonna be a long couple of weeks or weekends I should say. We are taking my mom back to the city this weekend and then next weekend a friend wants to come visit him. He misses us and is lonely (that may also be because his wife and daughter are still in another province at a childrens hospital), we miss him as well. It's just not the same with him in the city and us out in the country about 4 hours away.

Life will get easier soon as I will have my driver's license and hubby won't have to do all the driving anymore and he can sleep (he usually does as a passenger) when we go on trips.

Don't have more to say now, maybe later I will.

Who Knows

So it's been about a week since I posted last. A lot has happened, I did a work experience for school, hubby got a job, kid got sick.....What to talk about first?

First work experience for school was not what I expected at all. I was supposed to be shadowing and maybe doing actual work, but that didn't happen :( Instead I got farmed out to all these different services provided in the area. I found out about a lot of services and help available. It's gonna help me get my mother to move back here.

Hubby's job is to pick up recycling and sort it. A very dirty job and physical as well. The youngest has been battling a cold for about 2 weeks now and on the weekend it turned into an ear infection. Not pretty at all.

So all in all it was a very interesting week, more again soon I hope.

Life

Well it's been a couple of days again. Not much happening here, did get some good news tho. Hubby got a job and the oldest is in for a visit and he has a job as well. With my little course we have a one week work placement and we had to give a list of places we'd like to go. I chose the DFC, cause it deals with aboriginal people mostly and that is something I'd like to get into. Helping families in need, but not be a social worker, I don't think I could do that. Plus it's 4 years of university and I'm not moving back to the city for anything.

I'm supposed to keep a journal for how the week goes to share with the class. More touchy feely crap :P Oh well can't get away without it. Last week for some reason I was all dressed and ready to go to school, at the door I just couldn't make myself go through it. It happened for 2 days. Not sure what was going on, maybe the depression is getting worse or am I starting to get panic attacks? Who knows? I don't.

Well that's it for now. :)

Just stuff

Well I don't blog much. Hmmm..... what to say today? Another week has gone by and still going to school and learning about myself. I can really do with out all the touchy feely crap, but it's not gonna happen so I might as well suck it up.

This week had 'Emergency First Aid' and I'll tell you if your not breathing, I'm going for help cause I just cannot get down on my knees to do CPR. My knees are still bruised and tender. :( As for the instructor well she can do with some lessons in being a people person. As they say you attract more with honey than vinegar. :)

We also watched some movies. 'Give Them the Pickle' and 'The Secret' both were good movies. The power of positive thinking. Not much else right now. Later all.

Another Week Gone

Well it's been another week of school and boy was it a doozy. I missed a day this week and apparently there was a big blowup between the rest of the class and the guest instructor. It was about whether little boys should be allowed to wear dresses and play with dolls. Now I have no issues with boys playing with dolls, but the wearing of dresses is something else.

1) Are the parents putting the child in the dresses? If they are then I believe the parents should be taken out back and ....... well you get the picture :)

2) Is the child the one wanting to wear the dresses? If it's the childs choice then fine with me. I'm all for freedom of expression from kids. I may not want them to go out in public dressed like that, but again it's their choice.

Enough of that topic. As a project for class we had to write about someone or someones who inspire us and why. We also have to present to the class. Well I chose my older brother for this for many reasons which I will not go into here. I sent him a copy of the project for his opinion and if there was anything I missed. He sent it back to me with very few changes and that it was no fair cause he was checking his email at work and to tear up was unmanly like. :) I liked what he added to it and I'll keep it that way.

As for other things that happened this week not much really.

My First Post

Ok here goes nothing. The first post is about a course I'm taking.

Ok it’s been about 4 weeks into the program and I’ve flat out refused to do a presentation that she gave us for an assignment. They kept bugging me to do the presentation because they all did it. I don’t see why I have to do something that I don’t feel comfortable doing. It’s the first time I said “ No I’m not going to do this” Other students have flat out refused to do stuff and she didn’t bug them about it and people in the class did not say that they felt ‘jipped’ about it. But for some unknown reason I seem to get put on for this. I have never before refused to do a project or presentation so I don't know what the big deal was about this. Who knows what people want. I sure don't.

This course has helped me to understand myself more tho. I have learned that I am not artistic and I'm methodical and controlling. Also in stressful and confrontational situations I tend to turn inwards and disengage emotionally and sometimes physically. I also learned that I don't want to work in a restaurant anymore, I want to do something in the community. Like be a support worker ( not a social worker ). Who knows it may happen :)